「it’spossible,」shesaid,andlookedtowardsthelake.「thisisaverypeacefulplace.onewouldthinkawriterwouldbehappyhere—ifawriteriseverhappyanywhere.」sheturnedtolookatme.「soyouwon’tbepersuadedtodowhatrogerasked.」

「there’snopointinit,mrs.wade.nothingicoulddo.i’vesaidallthisbefore.icouldn’tbesureofbeingaroundattherighttime.i’dhavetobearoundallthetime.that’simpossible,evenifihadnothingelsetodo.ifhewentwild,forexample,itwouldhappeninaflash.andihaven’tseenanyindicationsthathedoesgetwild.heseemsprettysolidtome.」

shelookeddownatherhands.「ifhecouldfinishhisbook,ithinkthingswouldbemuchbetter.」

「ican’thelphimdothat.」

shelookedupandputherhandsontheedgeofthechaisebesideher.sheleanedforwardalittle.「youcanifhethinksyoucan.that’sthewholepoint.isitthatyouwouldfinditdistastefultobeaguestinourhouseandbepaidforit?」

「heneedsapsychiatrist,mrs.wade.ifyouknowonethatisn’taquack.」

shelookedstartled.「apsychiatrist?why?」

iknockedtheashesoutofmypipeandsatholdingit,waitingforthebowltogetcoolerbeforeiputitaway.

「youwantanamateuropinion,hereitis.hethinkshehasasecretburiedinhismindandhecan’tgetatit.itmaybeaguiltysecretabouthimself,itmaybeaboutsomeoneelse.hethinksthat’swhatmakeshimdrink,becausehecan’tgetatthisthing.heprobablythinksthatwhateverhappened,happenedwhilehewasdrunkandheoughttofinditwhereverpeoplegowhenthey’redrunk—reallybaddrunk,thewayhegets.that’sajobforapsychiatrist.sofar,sogood.ifthatiswrong,thenhegetsdrunkbecausehewantstoorcan’thelpit,andtheideaaboutthesecretisjusthisexcuse.hecan’twritehisbook,oranywaycan’tfinishit.becausehegetsdrunk.thatis,theassumptionseemstobethathecan’tfinishhisbookbecauseheknockshimselfoutbydrinking.itcouldbetheotherwayaround.」

「ohno,」shesaid.「no.rogerhasagreatdealoftalent.ifeelquitesurethathisbestworkisstilltocome.」

「itoldyouitwasanamateuropinion.yousaidtheothermorningthathemighthavefallenoutoflovewithhiswife.that’ssomethingelsethatcouldgotheotherwayaround.」

shelookedtowardsthehouse,thenturnedsothatshehadherbacktoit.ilookedthesameway.wadewasstandinginsidethedoors,lookingoutatus.asiwatchedhemovedbehindthebarandreachedforabottle.

「there’snouseinterfering,」shesaidquickly.「ineverdo.never.isupposeyou’reright,mr.marlowe.therejustisn’tanythingtodobutlethimworkitoutofhissystem.」

thepipewascoolnowandiputitaway.「sincewe’regropingaroundinthebackofthedrawer,howaboutthatotherwayaround?」

「ilovemyhusband,」shesaidsimply.「notasayounggirlloves,perhaps.butilovehim.awomanisonlyayounggirlonce.themanilovedthenisdead.hediedinthewar.hisname,strangelyenough,hadthesameinitialsasyours.itdoesn’tmatternow—exceptthatsometimesican’tquitebelievethatheisdead.hisbodywasneverfound.butthathappenedtomanymen.」

shegavemealongsearchinglook.「sometimes—notoften,ofcourse—whenigointoaquietcocktailloungeorthelobbyofagoodhotelatadeadhour,oralongthedeckofalinerearlyinthemorningorverylateatnight,ithinkimayseehimwaitingformeinsomeshadowycorner.」shepausedanddroppedhereyes.「it’sverysilly.i’mashamedofit.wewereverymuchinlove—thewild,mysterious,improbablekindoflovethatnevercomesbutonce.」

shestoppedtalkingandsattherehalfinatrancelookingoutoverthelake.ilookedbackatthehouseagain.wadewasstandingjustinsidetheopenfrenchwindowswithaglassinhishand.ilookedbackateileen.forheriwasn’tthereanymore.igotupandwentintothehouse.wadestoodtherewiththedrinkandthedrinklookedprettyheavy.andhiseyeslookedwrong.

「howyoumakingoutwithmywife,marlowe?」itwassaidwithatwistofthemouth.

「nopasses,ifyoumeanitthatway.」

「that’sexactlythewayimeanit.yougottokisshertheothernight.probablyfancyyourselfasafastworker,butyou’rewastingyourtime,bud.evenifyouhadtherightkindofpolish.」

itriedtomovearoundhimbutheblockedmewithasolidshoulder.「don’thurryaway,oldman,welikeyouaround.wegetsofewprivatedicksinourhouse.」

「i’mtheonetoomany,」isaid.

hehoistedtheglassanddrankfromit.whenhelowereditheleeredatme.

「yououghttogiveyourselfalittlemoretimetobuildresistance,」itoldhim.「emptywords,huh?」

「okay,coach.somelittlecharacterbuilder,aren’tyou?yououghttohavemoresensethantotryeducatingadrunk.drunksdon’teducate,myfriend.theydisintegrate.andpartoftheprocessisalotoffun.」hedrankfromtheglassagain,leavingitnearlyempty.「andpartofitisdamnedawful.butifimayquotethescintillatingwordsofthegooddr.loring,abastardlybastardwithalittleblackbag,stayawayfrommywife,marlowe.sureyougoforher.theyalldo.you’dliketosleepwithher.theyallwould.you’dliketoshareherdreamsandsnifftheroseofhermemories.maybeiwouldtoo.butthereisnothingtoshare,chum—nothing,nothing,nothing.you’reallaloneinthedark.」

hefinishedhisdrinkandturnedtheglassupsidedown.

「emptylikethat,marlowe.nothingthereatall.i’mtheguythatknows.」

heputtheglassontheedgeofthebarandwalkedstifflytothefootofthestairs.hemadeaboutadozenstepsup,holdingontotherail,andstoppedandleanedagainstit.helookeddownatmewithasourgrin.

「forgivethecornysarcasm,marlowe.you’reaniceguy.iwouldn’twantanythingtohappentoyou.」

「anythinglikewhat?」

「perhapsshedidn’tgetaroundyettothathauntingmagicofherfirstlove,theguythatwentmissinginnorway.youwouldn’twanttobemissing,wouldyou,chum?you’remyownspecialprivateeye.youfindmewheni’mlostinthesavagesplendorofsepulvedacanyon.」hemovedthepalmofhishandinacircularmotiononthepolishedwoodbanister.「itwouldhurtmetothequickifyougotlostyourself.likethatcharacterwhohitchedupwiththelimeys.hegotsolostamansometimeswondersifheeverexisted.youfigureshecouldhavemaybejustinventedhimtohaveatoytoplaywith?」

「howwouldiknow?」

helookeddownatme.thereweredeeplinesbetweenhiseyesnowandhismouthwastwistedwithbitterness.

「howwouldanybodyknow?maybeshedon’tknowherself.baby’stired.babybeenplayingtoolongwithbrokentoys.babywantstogobye-bye.」

hewentonupthestairs.

istoodthereuntilcandycameinandstartedtidyinguparoundthebar,puttingglassesonatray,examiningbottlestoseewhatwasleft,payingnoattentiontome.orsoithought.thenhesaid:「señor.onegooddrinkleft.pitytowastehim.」heheldupabottle.

「youdrinkit.」

「gracias,señor,nomegusta.unvasodecerveza,nomás.aglassofbeerismylimit.」

「wiseman.」

「onelushinthehouseisenough,」hesaid,staringatme.「ispeakgoodenglish,not?」

「sure,fine.」

「butithinkspanish.sometimesithinkwithaknife.thebossismyguy.hedon’tneedanyhelp,hombre.itakecareofhim,see.」

「agreatjobyou’redoing,punk.」

「hijodelaflauta,」hesaidbetweenhiswhiteteeth.hepickedupaloadedtrayandswungitupontheedgeofhisshoulderandtheflatofhishand,busboystyle.

iwalkedtothedoorandletmyselfout,wonderinghowanexpressionmeaning「sonofaflute」hadcometobeaninsultinspanish.ididn’twonderverylong.ihadtoomanyotherthingstowonderabout.somethingmorethanalcoholwasthematterwiththewadefamily.alcoholwasnomorethanadisguisedreaction.

laterthatnight,betweennine-thirtyandten,icalledthewades’number.aftereightringsihungup,butihadonlyjusttakenmyhandofftheinstrumentwhenitstartedtoringme.itwaseileenwade.

「someonejustranghere,」shesaid.「ihadasortofhunchitmightbeyou.iwasjustgettingreadytotakeashower.」

「itwasme,butitwasn’timportant,mrs.wade.heseemedalittlewoolly-headedwhenileft—rogerdid.iguessmaybeifeelalittleresponsibilityforhimbynow.」

「he’squiteallright,」shesaid.「fastasleepinbed.ithinkdr.loringupsethimmorethanheshowed.nodoubthetalkedalotofnonsensetoyou.」

「hesaidhewastiredandwantedtogotobed.prettysensible,ithought.」

「ifthatisallhesaid,yes.well,goodnightandthankyouforcalling,mr.marlowe.」

「ididn’tsayitwasallhesaid.isaidhesaidit.」

therewasapause,then:「everyonegetsfantasticideasonceinawhile.don’ttakerogertooseriously,mr.marlowe.afterall,hisimaginationisratherhighlydeveloped.naturallyitwouldbe.heshouldn’thavehadanythingtodrinksosoonafterthelasttime.pleasetrytoforgetallaboutit.isupposehewasrudetoyouamongotherthings.」

「hewasn’trudetome.hemadequitealotofsense.yourhusbandisaguywhocantakealonghardlookathimselfandseewhatisthere.it’snotaverycommongift.mostpeoplegothroughlifeusinguphalftheirenergytryingtoprotectadignitytheyneverhad.goodnight,mrs.wade.」

shehungupandisetoutthechessboard.ifilledapipe,paradedthechessmenandinspectedthemforfrenchshavesandloosebuttons,andplayedachampionshiptournamentgamebetweengortchakoffandmeninkin,seventy-twomovestoadraw,aprizespecimenoftheirresistibleforcemeetingtheimmovableobject,abattlewithoutarmor,awarwithoutblood,andaselaborateawasteofhumanintelligenceasyoucouldfindanywhereoutsideanadvertisingagency.