“doyoudothistopeopleordotheydoittoyou?”
hismouthquirksup,eitheramusedorrelieved.
“people?”heblinksacoupleoftimesasheconsidershisanswer.“idothistowomenwhowantmeto.”
idon’tunderstand.
“ifyouha一vewillingvolunteers,whyamihere?”
“becauseiwanttodothiswithyou,verymuch.”
“oh,”igasp.why?
iwandertothefarcorneroftheroomandpatthewaisthighpaddedbenchandrunmyfingersovertheleather.helikestohurtwomen.thethoughtdepressesme.
“you’reasadist?”
“i’madominant.”hiseyesareascorchinggray,intense.
“whatdoesthatmean?”iwhisper.
“itmeansiwantyoutowillinglysurrenderyourselftome,inallthings.”
ifrownathimasitrytoassimilatethisidea.
“whywouldidothat?”
“topleaseme,”hewhispersashecockshisheadtooneside,andiseeaghostofasmile.
pleasehim!hewantsmetopleasehim!ithinkmymouthdropsopen.pleasechristiangrey.andirealize,inthatmoment,thatyes,that’sexactlywhatiwanttodo.iwanthimtobedamneddelightedwithme.it’sarevelation.
“inverysimpleterms,iwantyoutowanttopleaseme,”hesayssoftly.hisvoiceishypnotic.
“howdoidothat?”mymouthisdry,andiwishihadmorewine.okay,iunderstandthepleasingbit,butiampuzzledbythesoft-boudoir-elizabethan-torturesetup.doiwanttoknowtheanswer?
“iha一verules,andiwantyoutocomplywiththem.theyareforyourbenefitandformypleasure.ifyoufollowtheserulestomysatisfaction,ishallrewardyou.ifyoudon’t,ishallpunishyou,andyouwilllearn,”hewhispers.iglanceattherackofcanesashesaysthis.
“andwheredoesallthisfitin?”iwa一vemyhandinthegeneraldirectionoftheroom.
“it’sallpartoftheincentivepackage.bothrewardandpunishment.”
“soyou’llgetyourkicksbyexertingyourwilloverme.”
“it’saboutgainingyourtrustandyourrespect,soyou’llletmeexertmywilloveryou.iwillgainagreatdealofpleasure,joy,eveninyoursubmission.themoreyousubmit,thegreatermyjoy–it’saverysimpleequation.”
“okay,andwhatdoigetoutofthis?”
heshrugsandlooksalmostapologetic.
“me,”hesayssimply.
ohmy.christianrakeshishandthroughhishairashegazesatme.
“you’renotgivinganythingaway,anastasia,”hemurmurs,exasperated.“let’sgobackdownstairswhereicanconcentratebetter.it’sverydistractingha一vingyouinhere.”heholdshishandouttome,andnowi’mhesitanttotakeit.
katehadsaidhewasdangerous,shewassoright.howdidsheknow?he’sdangeroustomyhealth,becauseiknowi’mgoingtosayyes.andpartofmedoesn’twantto.partofmewantstorunscreamingfromthisroomandallitrepresents.iamsooutofmydepthhere.
“i’mnotgoingtohurtyou,anastasia.”hisgrayeyesimplore,andiknowhespeaksthetruth.itakehishand,andheleadsmeoutofthedoor.
“ifyoudothis,letmeshowyou.”ratherthangoingbackdownstairs,heturnsrightoutoftheplayroom,ashecallsit,anddownacorridor.wepassseveraldoorsuntilwereachtheoneattheend.beyonditisabedroomwithalargedoublebed,allinwhite…everything,furniture,walls,bedding.it’ssterileandcoldbutwiththemostgloriousviewofseattlethroughtheglasswall.
“thiswillbeyourroom.youcandecorateithowyoulike,ha一vewhateveryoulikeinhere.”
“myroom?you’reexpectingmetomovein?”ican’thidethehorrorinmyvoice.
“notfulltime.justsay,fridayeveningthroughsunday.weha一vetotalkaboutallthat,negotiate.ifyouwanttodothis,”headds,hisvoicequietandhesitant.
“i’llsleephere?”
“yes.”
“notwithyou.”
“no.itoldyou,idon’tsleepwithanyone,exceptyou,whenyou’restupefiedwithdrink.”hiseyesarereprimanding.
mymouthpressesinahardline.thisiswhaticannotreconcile.kind,caringchristian,whorescuesmefrominebriationandholdsmegentlywhilei’mthrowingupintotheazaleas,andthemonsterwhopossesseswhipsandchainsinaspecialroom.
“wheredoyousleep?”
“myroomisdownstairs.come,youmustbehungry.”
“weirdly,iseemtoha一velostmyappetite,”imurmurpetulantly.
“youmusteat,anastasia,”headmonishesand,takingmyhand,leadsmebackdownstairs.
backintheimpossiblybigroom,iamfilledwithdeeptrepidation.iamontheedgeofaprecipice,andiha一vetodecidewhetherornottojump.
“i’mfullyawarethatthisisadarkpathi’mleadingyoudown,anastasia,whichiswhyireallywantyoutothinkaboutthis.youmustha一vesomequestions,”hesaysashewandersintothekitchenarea,releasingmyhand.
ido.butwheretostart?
“you’vesignedyournda,youcanaskmeanythingyouwant,andi’llanswer.”
istandatthebreakfastbarwatchinghimasheopenstherefrigeratorandpullsoutaplateofdifferentcheeseswithtwolargebunchesofgreenandredgrapes.hesetstheplatedownontheworktopandproceedstocutupafrenchbaguette.
“sit.”hepointstooneofthebarstoolsatthebreakfastbar,andiobeyhiscommand.ifi’mgoingtodothis,i’mgoingtoha一vetogetusedtoit.irealizehe’sbeenthisbossysinceimethim.
“youmentionedpaperwork.”
“yes.”
“whatpaperwork?”
“well,apartfromthenda,acontractsayingwhatwewillandwon’tdo.ineedtoknowyourlimits,andyouneedtoknowmine.thisisconsensual,anastasia.”
“andifidon’twanttodothis?”
“that’sfine,”hesayscarefully.
“butwewon’tha一veanysortofrelationship?”iask.
“no.”
“why?”
“thisistheonlysortofrelationshipi’minterestingin.”
“why?”
heshrugs.
“it’sthewayiam.”
“howdidyoubecomethisway?”
“whyisanyonethewaytheyare?that’skindofhardtoanswer.whydosomepeoplelikecheeseandotherpeoplehateit?doyoulikecheese?mrs.jones–myhousekeeper–hasleftthisforsupper.”hetakessomelarge,whiteplatesfromacupboardandplacesoneinfrontofme.
we’retalkingaboutcheese…holycrap.
“whatareyourrulesthatiha一vetofollow?”
“iha一vethemwrittendown.we’llgothroughthemoncewe’veeaten.”
food.howcanieatnow?
“i’mreallynothungry,”iwhisper.
“youwilleat,”hesayssimply.dominatingchristian,itallbecomesclear.“wouldyoulikeanotherglassofwine?”
“yes,please.”
hepourswineintomyglassandcomestositbesideme.itakeahastysip.
“helpyourselftofood,anastasia.”
itakeasmallbunchofgrapes.thisicanmanage.henarrowshiseyes.
“ha一veyoubeenlikethisforawhile?”iask.
“yes.”
“isiteasytofindwomenwhowanttodothis?”
heraisesaneyebrowatme.
“you’dbeamazed,”hesaysdryly.
“thenwhyme?ireallydon’tunderstand.”
“anastasia,i’vetoldyou.there’ssomethingaboutyou.ican’tlea一veyoualone.”hesmilesironically.“i’mlikeamothtoaflame.”hisvoicedarkens.“iwantyouverybadly,especiallynow,whenyou’rebitingyourlipagain.”hetakesadeepbreathandswallows.
mystomachsomersaults–hewantsme…inaweirdway,true,butthisbeautiful,strange,kinkymanwantsme.
“ithinkyouha一vethatclichéthewrongwayround.”igrumble.iamthemothandheistheflame,andi’mgoingtogetburnt.iknow.
“eat!”
“no.iha一ven’tsignedanythingyet,soithinki’llhangontomyfreewillforabitlonger,ifthat’sokaywithyou.”
hiseyessoften,andhislipsturnupinasmile.
“asyouwish,misssteele.”
“howmanywomen?”iblurtoutthequestion,buti’msocurious.
“fifteen.”
oh…notasmanyasithought.
“forlongperiodsoftime?”
“someofthem,yes.”
“ha一veyoueverhurtanyone?”
“yes.”
holyshit.
“badly?”
“no.”
“willyouhurtme?”
“whatdoyoumean?”
“physically,willyouhurtme?”
“iwillpunishyouwhenyourequireit,anditwillbepainful.”
ithinkifeelalittlefaint.itakeanothersipofwine.alcohol-thiswillmakemebra一ve.
“ha一veyoueverbeenbeaten?”iask.
“yes.”
oh…thatsurprisesme.beforeicanquestionhimonthisrevelationfurther,heinterruptsmytrainofthought.
“let’sdiscussthisinmystudy.iwanttoshowyousomething.”
thisissohardtoprocess.hereiwasfoolishlythinkingthati’dspendanightofunparalleledpassioninthisman’sbed,andwe’renegotiatingthisweirdarrangement.
ifollowhimintohisstudy,aspaciousroomwithanotherfloor-to-ceilingwindowthatopensoutontothebalcony.hesitsonthedesk,motionsformetositonaleatherchairinfrontofhim,andhandsmeapieceofpaper.
“thesearetherules.theymaybesubjecttochange.theyformpartofthecontract,whichyoucanalsoha一ve.readtheserulesandlet’sdiscuss.”
rules
obedience:
thesubmissivewillobeyanyinstructionsgivenbythedominantimmediatelywithouthesitationorreservationandinanexpeditiousmanner.thesubmissivewillagreetoanysexualactivitydeemedfitandpleasurablebythedominantexceptingthoseactivitieswhichareoutlinedinhardlimits(appendix2).shewilldosoeagerlyandwithouthesitation.
sleep:
thesubmissivewillensuresheachievesaminimumofsevenhourssleepanightwhensheisnotwiththedominant.
food:
thesubmissivewilleatregularlytomaintainherhealthandwellbeingfromaprescribedlistoffoods(appendix4).thesubmissivewillnotsnackbetweenmeals,withtheexceptionoffruit.
clothes:
duringtheterm,thesubmissivewillwearclothingonlyapprovedbythedominant.thedominantwillprovideaclothingbudgetforthesubmissive,whichthesubmissiveshallutilize.thedominantshallaccompanythesubmissivetopurchaseclothingonanadhocbasis.ifthedominantsorequires,thesubmissiveshallduringthetermanyadornmentsthedominantshallrequire,inthepresenceofthedominantandanyothertimethedominantdeemsfit.
exercise:
thedominantshallprovidethesubmissivewithapersonaltrainerfourtimesaweekinhour-longsessionsattimestobemutuallyagreedbetweenthepersonaltrainerandthesubmissive.thepersonaltrainerwillreporttothedominantonthesubmissive’sprogress.
personalhygiene/beauty:
thesubmissivewillkeepherselfcleanandsha一vedand/orwaxedatalltimes.thesubmissivewillvisitabeautysalonofthedominant’schoosingattimestobedecidedbythedominant,andundergowhatevertreatmentsthedominantseesfit.
personalsafety:
thesubmissivewillnotdrinktoexcess,smoke,takerecreationaldrugs,orputherselfinanyunnecessarydanger.
personalqualities:
thesubmissivewillnotenterintoanysexualrelationswithanyoneotherthanthedominant.thesubmissivewillconductherselfinarespectfulandmodestmanneratalltimes.shemustrecognizethatherbeha一viorisadirectreflectiononthedominant.sheshallbeheldaccountableforanymisdeeds,wrongdoings,andmisbeha一viorcommittedwhennotinthepresenceofthedominant.
failuretocomplywithanyoftheabovewillresultinimmediatepunishment,thenatureofwhichshallbedeterminedbythedominant.
holyfuck.
“hardlimits?”iask.
“yes.whatyouwon’tdo,whatiwon’tdo,weneedtospecifyinouragreement.”
“i’mnotsureaboutacceptingmoneyforclothes.itfeelswrong.”ishiftuncomfortably,theword‘ho’rattlingroundmyhead.
“iwanttola一vishmoneyonyou,letmebuyyousomeclothes.imayneedyoutoaccompanymetofunctions,andiwantyoudressedwell.i’msureyoursalary,whenyoudogetajob,won’tcoverthekindofclothesi’dlikeyoutowear.”
“idon’tha一vetowearthemwheni’mnotwithyou?”
“no.”
“okay.”thinkofthemasuniform.
“idon’twanttoexercisefourtimesaweek.”
“anastasia,ineedyousupple,strong,andwithstamina.trustme,youneedtoexercise.”
“butsurelynotfourtimesaweek,howaboutthree?”
“iwantyoutodofour.”
“ithoughtthiswasanegotiation?”
hepurseshislipsatme.
“okay,misssteele,anotherpointwellmade.howaboutanhouronthreedaysandonedayhalfanhour?”
“threedays,threehours.igettheimpressionyou’regoingtokeepmeexercisedwheni’mhere.”
hesmileswickedly,andhiseyesglowasifrelieved.“yes,iam.okay,agreed.areyousureyoudon’twanttointernatmycompany?you’reagoodnegotiator.”
“no,idon’tthinkthat’sagoodidea.”istaredownathisrules.waxing!waxingwhat?everything?ugh.
“so,limits.thesearemine.”hehandsmeanotherpieceofpaper.
hardlimits
noactsinvolvingfireplay
noactsinvolvingurinationordefecationandtheproductsthereof
noactsinvolvingneedles,knives,piercing,orblood
noactsinvolvinggynecologicalmedicalinstruments
noactsinvolvingchildrenoranimals
noactsthatwilllea一veanypermanentmarksontheskin
noactsinvolvingbreathcontrol
ugh.hehastowritethesedown!ofcourse–theyalllookverysensible,andfrankly,necessary…anysanepersonwouldn’twanttobeinvolvedinthissortofthingsurely?thoughinowfeelalittlequeasy.
“isthereanythingyou’dliketoadd?”heaskskindly.
crap.i’venoidea.iamcompletelystumped.hegazesatmeandfurrowshisbrow.
“isthereanythingyouwon’tdo?”
“idon’tknow.”
“whatdoyoumeanyoudon’tknow?”
isquirmuncomfortablyandbitemylip.
“i’veneverdoneanythinglikethis.”
“well,whenyou’vehadsex,wasthereanythingthatyoudidn’tlikedoing?”
forthefirsttimeinwhatseemstobeages,iblush.
“youcantellme,anastasia.weha一vetobehonestwitheachotherorthisisn’tgoingtowork.”
isquirmuncomfortablyagainandstareatmyknottedfingers.
“tellme,”hecommands.
“well…i’venothadsexbefore,soidon’tknow.”myvoiceissmall.ipeekupathim,andhe’sstaringatme,mouth-open,frozen,andpale-reallypale.
“never?”hewhispers.ishakemyhead.
“you’reavirgin?”hebreathes.inod,flushingagain.hecloseshiseyesandlookstobecountingtoten.whenheopensthemagain,he’sangry,glaringatme.
“whythefuckdidn’tyoutellme?”hegrowls.
christianisrunningbothhishandsthroughhishairandpacingupanddownhisstudy.twohands–that’sdoubleexasperation.hisusualconcretecontrolseemstoha一veslippedanotch.
“idon’tunderstandwhyyoudidn’ttellme,”hecastigatesme.
“thesubjectnevercameup.i’mnotinthehabitofrevealingmysexualstatustoeveryoneimeet.imean,wehardlyknoweachother.”i’mstaringatmyhands.whyamifeelingguilty?whyishesomad?ipeekupathim.
“well,youknowalotmoreaboutmenow,”hesnaps,hismouthpressesintoahardline.“iknewyouwereinexperienced,butavirgin!”hesaysitlikeit’sareallydirtyword.“hell,ana,ijustshowedyou,”hegroans.“maygodforgiveme.ha一veyoueverbeenkissed,apartfrombyme?”
“ofcourseiha一ve.”itrymybesttolookaffronted.okay…maybetwice.
“andaniceyoungmanhasn’tsweptyouoffyourfeet?ijustdon’tunderstand.you’retwenty-one,nearlytwenty-two.you’rebeautiful.”herunshishandthroughhishairagain.
beautiful.iflushwithpleasure.christiangreythinksi’mbeautiful.iknotmyfingerstogether,staringatthemhard,tryingtoconcealmygoofygrin.perhapshe’snear-sighted,mysubconscioushasrearedhersomnambulanthead.wherewasshewhenineededher?
“andyou’reseriouslydiscussingwhatiwanttodo,whenyouha一venoexperience.”hisbrowsknittogether.“howha一veyoua一voidedsex?tellme,please.”
ishrug.
“noone’sreally,youknow.”comeuptoscratch,onlyyou.andyouturnouttobesomekindofmonster.“whyareyousoangrywithme?”iwhisper.
“i’mnotangrywithyou,i’mangrywithmyself.ijustassumed…”hesighs.heregardsmeshrewdlyandthenshakeshishead.“doyouwanttogo?”heasks,hisvoicegentle.
“no,unlessyouwantmetogo,”imurmur.ohno…idon’twanttolea一ve.
“ofcoursenot.ilikeha一vingyouhere.”hefrownsashesaysthisandthenglancesathiswatch.“it’slate.”andheturnstolookatme.“you’rebitingyourlip.”hisvoiceishusky,andhe’seyeingmespeculatively.
“sorry.”
“don’tapologize.it’sjustthatiwanttobiteittoo,hard.”
igasp…howcanhesaythingslikethattomeandnotexpectmetobeaffected.
“come,”hemurmurs.”
“what?”
“we’regoingtorectifythesituationrightnow.”
“whatdoyoumean?whatsituation?”
“yoursituation.ana,i’mgoingtomakelovetoyou,now.”
“oh.”thefloorhasfallenaway.i’masituation.i’mholdingmybreath.
“that’sifyouwantto,imean,idon’twanttopushmyluck.”
“ithoughtyoudidn’tmakelove.ithoughtyoufuckedhard.”iswallow,mymouthsuddenlydry.
hegivesmeawickedgrin,theeffectsofwhichtra一velallthewaydownthere.
“icanmakeanexception,ormaybecombinethetwo,we’llsee.ireallywanttomakelovetoyou.please,cometobedwithme.iwantourarrangementtowork,butyoureallyneedtoha一vesomeideawhatyou’regettingyourselfinto.wecanstartyourtrainingtonight–withthebasics.thisdoesn’tmeani’vecomeoverallheartsandflowers,it’sameanstoanend,butonethatiwant,andhopefullyyoudotoo.”hisgraygazeisintense.
iflush…ohmy…wishesdocometrue.
“butiha一ven’tdoneallthethingsyourequirefromyourlistofrules.”myvoiceisallbreathy,hesitant.
“forgetabouttherules.forgetaboutallthosedetailsfortonight.iwantyou.i’vewantedyousinceyoufellintomyoffice,andiknowyouwantme.youwouldn’tbesittingherecalmlydiscussingpunishmentandhardlimitsifyoudidn’t.please,ana,spendthenightwithme.”heholdshishandouttome,hiseyesarebright,fervent…excited,andiputmyhandinhis.hepullsmeupandintohisarmssoicanfeelthelengthofhisbodyagainstmine,thisswiftactiontakingmebysurprise.herunshisfingersroundthenapeofmyneck,windsmyponytailaroundhiswrist,andgentlypullssoi’mforcedtolookupathim.hegazesdownatme.
“youareonebra一veyoungwoman,”hewhispers.“iaminaweofyou.”
hiswordsarelikesomekindofincendiarydevice;mybloodflames.heleansdownandkissesmylipsgently,andhesucksatmylowerlip.
“iwanttobitethislip,”hemurmursagainstmymouth,andcarefullyhetugsatitwithhisteeth.imoan,andhesmiles.
“pleaseana,letmemakelovetoyou.”
“yes,”iwhisper,becausethat’swhyi’mhere.hissmileistriumphantashereleasesmeandtakesmyhandandleadsmethroughtheapartment.
hisbedroomisvast.theceilingheightwindowslookoutonalitup,high-riseseattle.thewallsarewhite,andthefurnishingsarepaleblue.theenormousbedisultra-modern,madeofrough,greywood,likedriftwood,fourposts,butnocanopy.onthewallaboveitisastunningpaintingofthesea.
iamquakinglikealeaf.thisisit.finally,afterallthistime,i’mgoingtodoit,withnoneotherthanchristiangrey.mybreathisshallow,andican’ttakemyeyesoffhim.heremoveshiswatchandplacesitontopofachestofdrawersthatmatchesthebed,andremoveshisjacket,placingitonachair.he’sdressedinhiswhitelinenshirtandjeans.heisheart-stoppinglybeautiful.hisdarkcopperhairisamess,hisshirthangingout–hisgrayeyesboldanddazzling.hestepsoutofhisconverseshoesandreachesdownandtakeshissocksoffinpidually.christiangrey’sfeet…wow…whatisitaboutnakedfeet?turning,hegazesatme,hisexpressionsoft.
“iassumeyou’renotonthepill.”
what!shit.
“ididn’tthinkso.”heopensthetopdrawerofthechestandremovesapacketofcondoms.hegazesatmeintently.
“beprepared,”hemurmurs.“doyouwanttheblindsdrawn?”
“idon’tmind.”iwhisper.“ithoughtyoudidn’tletanyonesleepinyourbed.”
“whosayswe’regoingtosleep?”hemurmurssoftly.
“oh.”holyhell.
hestrollsslowlytowardme.confident,sexy,eyesblazing,andmyheartbeginstopound.myblood’spumpingaroundmybody.desire,thickandhot,poolsinmybelly.hestandsinfrontofme,staringdownintomyeyes.he’ssofreakinghot.
“let’sgetthisjacketoff,shallwe?”hesayssoftly,andtakesholdofthelapelsandgentlyslidesmyjacketoffmyshoulders.heplacesitonthechair.
“doyouha一veanyideahowmuchiwantyou,anasteele?”hewhispers.mybreathhitches.icannottakemyeyesoffhis.hereachesupandgentlyrunshisfingersdownmycheektomychin.
“doyouha一veanyideawhati’mgoingtodotoyou?”headds,caressingmychin.
themusclesinsidethedeepest,darkestpartofmeclenchinthemostdeliciousfashion.thepainissosweetandsharpiwanttoclosemyeyes,buti’mhypnotizedbyhisgrayeyesstaringferventlyintomine.leaningdown,hekissesme.hislipsaredemanding,firmandslow,moldingmine.hestartsunbuttoningmyshirtwhileheplacesfeather-likekissesacrossmyjaw,mychin,andthecornersofmymouth.slowlyhepeelsitoffmeandletsitfalltothefloor.hestandsbackandgazesatme.i’minthepalebluelacyperfect-fitbra.thankhea一vens.
“oh,ana,”hebreathes.“youha一vethemostbeautifulskin,paleandflawless.iwanttokisseverysingleinchofit.”
iflush.ohmy…whydidhesayhecouldn’tmakelove?iwilldoanythinghewants.hegraspsmyhairtie,pullsitfree,andgaspsasmyhaircascadesdownaroundmyshoulders.
“ilikebrunettes,”hemurmurs,andbothofhishandsareinmyhair,graspingeachsideofmyhead.hiskissisdemanding,histongueandlipscoaxingmine.imoan,andmytonguetentativelymeetshis.heputshisarmsaroundmeandhaulsmeagainsthisbody,squeezingmetightly.onehandremainsinmyhair,theothertra一velsdownmyspinetomywaistanddowntomybehind.hishandflexesovermybacksideandsqueezesgently.heholdsmeagainsthiships,andifeelhiserection,whichhelanguidlypushesintome.
imoanoncemoreintohismouth.icanhardlycontaintheriotousfeelingsorisithormonesthatrampagethroughmybody.iwanthimsobadly.grippinghisupperarms,ifeelhisbiceps,he’ssurprisinglystrong…muscular.tentatively,imovemyhandsuptohisfaceandintohishair.holymoses.it’ssosoft,unruly.ituggently,andhegroans.heeasesmetowardthebed,untilifeelitbehindmyknees.ithinkhe’sgoingtopushmedownontoit,buthedoesn’t.releasingme,hesuddenlydropstohisknees.hegrabsmyhipswithbothhishandsandrunshistonguearoundmyna一vel,thengentlynipshiswaytomyhipbone,thenacrossmybellytomyotherhipbone.
“ah,”igroan.
seeinghimonhiskneesinfrontofme,feelinghismouthonme,it’ssounexpected,,andhot.myhandsstayinhishair,pullinggentlyasitrytoquietmytoo-loudbreathing.hegazesupatmethroughimpossiblylonglashes,hiseyesascorchingsmokygray.hishandsreachupandundothebuttononmyjeans,andheleisurelypullsdownthezipper.withouttakinghiseyesoffmine,hishandsmovebeneaththewaistband,skimmingmeandmovingtomybehind.hishandsglideslowlydownmybacksidetomythighs,removingmyjeansastheygo.icannotlookaway.hestopsandlickshislips,neverbreakingeyecontact.heleansforward,runninghisnoseuptheapexbetweenmythighs.ifeelhim.there.
“yousmellsogood,”hemurmursandcloseshiseyes,alookofpurepleasureonhisface,andipracticallyconvulse.hereachesupandtugstheduvetoffthebed,thenpushesmegentlysoifallontothemattress.
stillkneeling,hegraspsmyfootandundoesmyconverse,pullingoffmyshoeandsock.iraisemyselfuponmyelbowstoseewhathe’sdoing.i’mpanting…wanting.heliftsmyfootbytheheelandrunshisthumbnailupmyinstep.it’salmostpainful,butifeelthemovementechoedinmygroin.igasp.nottakinghiseyesoffmine,againherunshistonguealongmyinstepandthenhisteeth.shit.igroan…howcanifeelthis,there.ifallbackontothebed,moaning.ihearhissoftchuckle.
“oh,ana,whaticoulddotoyou,”hewhispers.heremovesmyothershoeandsock,thenstandsandremovesmyjeans.i’mlyingonhisbeddressedonlyinmybraandpanties,andhe’sstaringdownatme.
“you’reverybeautiful,anastasiasteele.ican’twaittobeinsideyou.”
holyshit.hiswords.he’ssoseductive.hetakesmybreathaway.
“showmehowyoupleasureyourself.”
what?ifrown.
“don’tbecoy,ana,showme,”hewhispers.
ishakemyhead.
“idon’tknowwhatyoumean.”myvoiceishoarse.ihardlyrecognizeit,lacedwithdesire.
“howdoyoumakeyourselfcome?iwanttosee.”
ishakemyhead.
“idon’t,”imumble.heraiseshiseyebrows,astonishedforamoment,andhiseyesdarken,andheshakeshisheadindisbelief.
“well,we’llha一vetoseewhatwecandoaboutthat.”hisvoiceissoft,challenging,adelicioussensualthreat.heundoesthebuttonsofhisjeansandslowlypullshisjeansdown,hiseyesonminethewholetime.heleansdownovermeand,graspingeachofmyankles,quicklyjerksmylegsapartandcrawlsontothebedbetweenmylegs.hehoversoverme.iamsquirmingwithneed.
“keepstill,”hemurmurs,andthenheleansdownandkissestheinsideofmythigh,trailingkissesup,overthethinlacymaterialofmypanties,kissingme.
oh…ican’tkeepstill.howcaninotmove?iwrigglebeneathhim.
“we’regoingtoha一vetoworkonkeepingyoustill,baby.”hetrailskissesupmybelly,andhistonguedipsintomyna一vel.stillhe’sheadingnorth,kissingmeacrossmytorso.myskinisburning.i’mflushed,toohot,toocold,andi’mclawingatthesheetbeneathme.helaydownbesideme,andhishandtrailsupfrommyhip,tomywaist,anduptomybreast.hegazesdownatme,hisexpressionunreadable,andgentlycupsmybreast.
“youfitmyhandperfectly,anastasia,”hemurmursanddipshisindexfingerintothecupofmybraandgentlyyanksitdownfreeingmybreast,buttheunderwireandfabricofthecupforceitupward.hisfingermovestomyotherbreastandrepeatstheprocess.mybreastsswell,andmynippleshardenunderhissteadygaze.iamtrussed-upbymyownbra.
“verynice,”hewhispersappreciatively,andmynippleshardenevenmore.
heblowsverygentlyononeashishandmovestomyotherbreast,andhisthumbslowlyrollstheendofmynipple,elongatingit.igroan,feelingthesweetsensationallthewaytomygroin.iamsowet.ohplease,ibeginternallyasmyfingersclaspthesheettighter.hislipsclosearoundmyothernippleandhetugs,inearlyconvulse.
“let’sseeifwecanmakeyoucomelikethis,”hewhispers,continuinghisslow,sensualassault.mynipplesbearthedeliciousbruntofhisdeftfingersandlips,settingalighteverysinglenerveendinginmybodysothatmywholebodysingswiththesweetagony.hejustdoesn’tstop.
“oh…please,”ibeg,andipullmyheadback,mymouthopenasigroan,mylegsstiffening.holyhell,what’shappeningtome?
“letgo,baby,”hemurmurs.histeethcloseroundmynipple,andhisthumbandfingerpullhard,andifallapartinhishands,mybodyconvulsingandshatteringintoathousandpieces.hekissesme,deeply,histongueinmymouthabsorbingmycries.
ohmy.thatwasextraordinary.nowiknowwhatallthefussisabout.hegazesdownatme,asatisfiedsmileonhisface,whilei’msurethere’snothingbutgratitudeandaweonmine.
“youareveryresponsive,”hebreathes.“you’regoingtoha一vetolearntocontrolthat,andit’sgoingtobesomuchfunteachingyouhow.”hekissesmeagain.